All my hope vanished when I received a quote from him this night that talks about how an angel and a demon could not fit into each other lives..It seemed as a hint for me.. I reacted to that by asking him whether he is avoiding me..for he had not texted me the whole day..when I received his text meassage, tears started to cloud my eyes..and there he told me that he has already came up with a decision..he wanted us to stop communicating.. he further explained that it would be beneficial for both of us since it would serve as a way for us not to hurt each other anymore.. he wanted me to stop hoping and to just have me belive that he doesn't love me anymore.. I tried explaining to him that it would just hurt me more..but he was already deaf with my reaction..he no longer wanted to hear me out.. I was so devastated that I locked up myself in the room and I refused to eat.. I couldn't find my apetite..all I know is that I'm gonna miss him..I was supposed to study for I have a test tomorrow but I keep hearing his voice inside my head,I could not concentrate with what I am doing..All I know is I'm hearing him say my name..the tone is so natural yet so appealing..I know no one could ever say my name the way that he does.. I could also hear him playing his guitar..so solemn that I've been wishing to sing with the tune..When I got out of the room, i opened my computer and went online.. An admirer kept on pestering me..how I just wish that it was him who keeps on messaging me.. When that admirer called me "Ate" I couldn't help but cry..That is what he used to call before he admitted to me that he likes me..I just realized that Im missing him so much.. being a certified masochist, I read the archive of our messages..we were so happy back then until that day when I have to finally tell him the truth..I know I made the right decision in telling him those things..maybe he is not the right man for me (though I feel he is)..well..just a thought that crossed my mind..maybe..im just paying for the hurt that I caused to "other" people..maybe this is what they call "karma"..
~ 99.9% deity and .1% human ~ 18 y/o ~ March 17 ~ DLSU-M ~ Management of Financial Institution major ~ former perpetualite ~ geek chic ~ cellphone addict ~ loves to surf the net ~ window shopper ~ bookworm ~ expeditious ~ S-I-M-E-C-O ~ silent water ~ obsessive compulsive ~ bratinella ~ has a bahala-na-si-batman attitude ~ movie addict ~ ceritified cute not just clever ~ dog lover ~ tactless ~ too assuming ~ hopeless romantic fool ~ bag collector ~ vain ~ childlike ~ frustrated dancer ~ feeling singer ~ has a face that would launch a thousand ships! ~ mcute_j17@yahoo.com
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All my hope vanished when I received a quote from him this night that talks about how an angel and a demon could not fit into each other lives..It seemed as a hint for me.. I reacted to that by asking him whether he is avoiding me..for he had not texted me the whole day..when I received his text meassage, tears started to cloud my eyes..and there he told me that he has already came up with a decision..he wanted us to stop communicating.. he further explained that it would be beneficial for both of us since it would serve as a way for us not to hurt each other anymore.. he wanted me to stop hoping and to just have me belive that he doesn't love me anymore.. I tried explaining to him that it would just hurt me more..but he was already deaf with my reaction..he no longer wanted to hear me out.. I was so devastated that I locked up myself in the room and I refused to eat.. I couldn't find my apetite..all I know is that I'm gonna miss him..I was supposed to study for I have a test tomorrow but I keep hearing his voice inside my head,I could not concentrate with what I am doing..All I know is I'm hearing him say my name..the tone is so natural yet so appealing..I know no one could ever say my name the way that he does.. I could also hear him playing his guitar..so solemn that I've been wishing to sing with the tune..When I got out of the room, i opened my computer and went online.. An admirer kept on pestering me..how I just wish that it was him who keeps on messaging me.. When that admirer called me "Ate" I couldn't help but cry..That is what he used to call before he admitted to me that he likes me..I just realized that Im missing him so much.. being a certified masochist, I read the archive of our messages..we were so happy back then until that day when I have to finally tell him the truth..I know I made the right decision in telling him those things..maybe he is not the right man for me (though I feel he is)..well..just a thought that crossed my mind..maybe..im just paying for the hurt that I caused to "other" people..maybe this is what they call "karma"..